Tuesday, January 31, 2012

31 days

Today is the last day of my fast/cleanse/project. I'm pretty damn proud of my myself for following through. So much has slowed. Work is slow. My social life is practically non-existant. I sit in my office daily, drinking tea, reading, contemplating. I usually falter when it comes to committing to myself.

I miss red wine. I miss beer. I miss stinky cheese and smoked wild salmon. Tomorrow, maybe.

Last night I pulled the novel manuscript out of the drawer beside my bed and began looking it over with as critical an eye I could manage. I took a knife to it and began cutting, butchering. Ouch. I have so much to do that needs to be done. The statue inside the block of marble. This time it won't be a waste of time. What helps: looking at the shelves upon shelves I have of books. If they could do it, so can I. Commitment, I has it.

I've been thinking a lot about what I want the novel to be about, the heart of it. I'm pretty sure I know now. It will be a tricky balance telling the story, the mythology without getting too dolphin worship-y, but I can do it.

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