Wednesday, March 7, 2012

so much

I've had the strangest, most wonderful few days, with a little worry mixed in. Work is busy. My creative life is alive, kicking.

I have an Einstein quote on the wall in front of my writing desk that I completely agree with. The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion that stands at the cradle of true art and true science. Whoever does not know it and can no longer wonder, is as good as dead, and his eyes are dimmed.

I've had a few good reminders of what matters. I was talking to my dad this morning and told him that I love when reminders come That all of the hours, the lifetime of work I have put in to my creative endeavors begins to pay off. Little road signs that I'm on the right track.

I was also thinking the terror that accompanies even imagined success. I was looking over some work that is important to me and I saw myself sliced open in the pages. But a friend reminded me that it is vulnerability that makes great art. Okay. But still, terror. I wrote a friend in an email last year that terror is the beginning of joy, Rilke inspired. Or that joy is the beginning on terror. Shadow, light, same same.

So joy, forthwith. Or something. Sometimes you have to just let go, go with the mystery. Aack.

The birthday cd I was given has some great music on it. Can't stop listening.

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